On Motherhood

I'm in the middle of writing a nice long post about my labor and delivery experience, so I hope I won't keep you all in suspense for too long. It is a very long post, because it was a very long process. Details to come.

I just wanted to write down a few thoughts about being a mommy.

I was very excited to learn that I was pregnant, but I was always very nervous too. I am a worrier by nature, and I was naturally concerned about this huge change in my life. It felt so very permanent in ways that going to college, getting married, getting a job, supporting my husband, and moving across the country didn't. I was nervous that I would get postpartum depression and not be able to enjoy my baby. I was worried that I wouldn't feel a connection to my child. I was worried that I would get frustrated easily, or be too tired. I was worried about a million things even right after I delivered her.

I can happily say now though, that I need not have worried. It took a few hours after her birth to set in, but in the scope of things, a couple measly hours is no big deal. I feel like I have known Little Miss forever, but I can't wait to get to know her personality. She is the most beautiful baby in my eyes, and I am devoted to this little bundle. So much so that when the doctor who diagnosed her hip dysplasia told us "don't worry, she's almost perfect", I almost threw something at the back of his head. She is my daughter, and she is perfect the way she is. I could stare at her forever, and I definitely cuddle with her longer than is absolutely necessary, even in the middle of the night. I love being her mother.

But I'm still happiest if I get a nap sometime during the day.

Labor Part 1: The First 12 hours
Labor Part 2: The Next 12 hours
Labor Part 3: The last 12 hours including delivery. Finally.